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Wednesday, January 23, 2013

I wish I could touch…..

I wish I could touch…..

I wish I could touch you.  Touch you once more.  Feel  the warmth on your skin.  

That day.   As you lay in the ICU.  Covered .  From head to toe.  Shrouded , I should say.  In that Solapuri Chaadar.  

They told me you had passed away.  Breathed your last.    

I had never  had  anybody  die on me.  Till that day.

I didn’t experience any emotion when they told me.  Just the words.. they  kept ringing in my ears.  “HE is  no more. “

I slid open the door . To the ICU.  I didn’t believe them.  I slid the sheet off your face.  You were sleeping.  No peaceful expression on your face.  You looked just like you slept at home - breathing laboriously, the exertion showing  on your face.   It showed now.

I  touched your forehead.  Just like I used to touch you each morning.  Each afternoon.  Each evening.  Every hour of the day.  For the fever.  To feel you breathe.  To feel you live.

Now ,  as my hand touched  your  forehead, I  feel the warmth still.  Not the warm warmth.  But the kind which is ebbing.

I touch your face.  To feel your breath.

I touch your chest.  To feel  the crackling spluttering breathing.  

It is silent in the ICU.  It is cold in the ICU.  
As are you.  Silent and cold.

I wish I could touch ..... touch you once more.   Feel you live.  Once more.


  1. Can't stop being emotive once reading this. Exact thing happened to me on the last day of my dad,but the environment is different.

    This post stirred my memories and incidents happened to me at 2008.

    Wish you get all the blessings from him

    You have not just created the post but your feelings lived in it

  2. hey, i am sorry .... missed your comment. the blog is still not used to recieving any. :-) but let me thank u fr having read , understood and apperciated.

  3. I have read many of your blog posts and found interesting. Few posts are thought provoking. Kudos to you and I hope your blog gets noticed and reaches to lot more people.

    All the best. Still reading many of your posts :) Wish you a good luck!